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“Let me put it to you this way. I’ve never really had sex, and I’ve never, ever really had a relationship,” Shaun said, looking at the cabin window.
“So you don’t know what it’s all about?” Liza sounded clearly unconvinced.
“Not exactly. I’ve petted a lot, and I’ve yearned for someone’s affection, but then, not everybody appreciates it when you tell ‘em how important they are to you, right?”
“So you’re saying that you’re this real, deep romantic dude who just always happens to be at the wrong end of the rainbow?” Each word seemed clearly more skeptical.
“Look, I know all this sounds very cinematic, OK, but,” Shaun said, crossing one leg over the other and swivelling around on his chair, Dr Alban style, “as they say, it is my life.”
“So I should stop bugging you, stop forcing you, stop…”
“No, just stop speaking now, and listen. The truth is, I really don’t know if I’m capable of this lovey dovey stuff anymore, right! I’m, like, kind of, devoid of feelings, of emotions, of…”
“OK, I get it. But don’t you want any meaning in that little hell-hole you call your life, huh?” Liza’s voice was perceptibly on a higher tone.
“Hey, that’s real cool, babe! I’m all ears for suggestions; just tell me, you got any spades full of heaven to fill it up, huh? HUH?” Shaun almost screamed in the end, and before could reply, he continued, “You really think I’m this jerk next door who likes to waste everyone in his way? Yeah, I’d really want someone to start bugging me, y’know? To nag me, scold me, to tell me to make a commitment, to breathe down my neck, to, to…”
“To care about you?”
“Yeah, well, somethin’ like that,” Shaun said , settling back down on his chair. (He had almost climbed onto his desk by now.)
“You know, Shaun, you should learn to look very, very carefully about you. The attention you want may not be that far after all.” Shaun almost smiled at this point. “But, hey, I’ve got to go now, so don’t start your bullshit with me again. Bye!”
“Hey, wait, I haven’t finished, hey Liz…!”
Liza had already closed the door by then, and Shaun sank back in his chair, with a multitude of feelings creeping into his brain and pulling him into a deep long slumber on his beloved office desk.
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Jun 12
8:49 PM
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