Sex has no calories;
Nothing improves with age;
Sex takes up the least amount of time and causes the most amount of trouble;
There is no remedy for sex but more sex
Virginity can be cured;
When a man's wife learns to understand him, she usually stops listening to him;
Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself;
Sex is dirty only if it's done right;
When the lights are out, all women are beautiful;
Sex is hereditary. If your parents never had it, chances are you won't either;
The younger the better;
Sex discriminates against the shy and the ugly;
Before you find your handsome prince, you've got to kiss a lot of frogs;
There may be some things better than sex, and some things worse than sex. But there is nothing exactly like it;
Love your neighbor, but don't get caught;
Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics;
You cannot produce a baby in one month by impregnating nine women;
Thou shalt not commit adultery.....unless in the mood;
Never lie down with a woman who's got more troubles than you;
Abstain from wine, women, and song; mostly song;
Never argue with a women when she's tired..... or rested;
A woman never forgets the men she could have had; a man, the women he couldn't;
Beauty is skin deep; ugly goes right to the bone;
Sex is one of the nine reasons for reincarnation; the other eight are unimportant;
Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking;
Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight;
"This won't hurt, I promise."

By Limbutza